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Did you ever feel pressure from people around you to heal from a concussion? Maybe your boss, friends, family, doctor, your partner and even from yourself? You’re not alone. In this post, I will share my experience and how to deal with this.
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Table of contents
Sometimes, I just wished I didn’t have to explain anything to anyone
Isn’t it hard to explain how you feel? How do you explain what a concussion feels like?
I think it’s the hardest thing to do as only you get how it feels when you sustain a concussion.
Having to deal with other people who have expectations and opinions about how to heal from a concussion and how fast you need to do this can give a lot of stress.
For example, my work asked me many times how I was doing. I felt the pressure I needed to go back as soon as possible.
How do you answer this question if you don’t feel well for months, don’t know how to heal from a concussion, and don’t even know when and if you will heal? It’s hard to explain when you’re back at work again.
It felt like my social life was slipping through my fingers
And what about friends? They were asking and texting me about how I was feeling, visiting, wishing you all the best. But over time, they didn’t ask me anymore to join them for dinner because I was always saying no.
I felt the pressure of having to explain things or to heal faster to not lose my social life as it was. I felt like it was slipping through my fingers, every month a bit more. I didn’t want to lose it, so I kept trying to keep up. Which, of course, didn’t help at all.
I didn’t want my family to worry about me
And then there is your family. My parents worried a lot about my health and tried to look for solutions too. They kept asking how I was feeling, just because they hoped I was feeling better soon.
Having to tell them over and over I wasn’t doing well was hurting them, I didn’t want to hurt them, I didn’t want them to worry about me.
It felt like I was failing against doctors
Many doctors told me they could help me, once they noticed I didn’t improve, even after tons of sessions. They had no clue what to do. If felt like I was failing; they gave me the feeling I wasn’t normal because “normally,” their work would help people.
It felt like I needed to defend myself that I really wasn’t feeling any better. Once they didn’t know what to do anymore, they told me that it could be my thoughts making me feel like this. “It was all in my head”. Yeah right…
I just wanted to get better, NOW
And then there was me. I am an impatient person. If I have something on my mind, it needs to be done TODAY. Well, during concussion recovery, this wasn’t happening.
I pushed myself to feel better, to pretend I was okay, to just go back to work while it wasn’t working and making me feel worse. Just because I wanted to feel normal.
Many times, I told myself: now it’s enough! Stop acting like this, you’re telling yourself you’re sick, just go to that social event and enjoy it. The longer you stay at home, the harder it is!
I wish I wasn’t that hard on myself
The biggest lesson I learned in my recovery when it comes to self-care is to not be so hard on myself. To take a step back if needed, to not feel guilty when I don’t do anything in a day.
Because I was so hard on myself, I also weighed heavily on the opinion of others. I didn’t want to make other people feel bad because of “my problems.” That’s how I felt for such a long time.
And because of that feeling, I see it now as a lack of self-care, I felt even more pressure to heal from a concussion.
I didn’t want to disappoint my boss for not being able to work, to give my colleagues more tasks because I couldn’t do them, to cancel social events and let friends down at the very last minute, to make my friends feel like I didn’t care anymore while I was caring more than ever, to make my family worry about me, to not fit in the picture of a perfect patient.
Self-care is so important - you don’t need to feel any pressure
I think when self-care is 100% okay, you don’t feel that much pressure from the outside world AND from yourself to heal from a concussion. You just know you need to push your health first; you are the most important person here.
It’s your journey, so your rules. Do whatever makes you feel better, you don’t need to justify what you’re doing. If it feels the best choice for you and your health, only then are you moving forward.
I see it like this: Every time you choose something else above your heath, you’re taking a step backward in your recovery.
Believe me, I took many steps backwards, and I wish I didn’t. I wish I put my health first from the very beginning.
So, for everyone who is reading this and wondering how to heal from a concussion, see this as a sign to put your health first, no matter what. The earlier you do this, the faster you will move forward.
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